11/24/2008

An Amazing thing.

Like I said, I'm trying not to live by feelings, but not all feelings are bad you know. Happiness is one of my favorites. Most of the time we all experience this when we get our own way, but that statement doesn't always imply somethings wrong in your life either. Tonight something happened my way because I wanted God's way. His will, His control in my life, His Son being my main focus. I'm slowly achieving that and gaining so much joy from it. I was able to deal with things all though they weren't exactly how I would have chosen, God is getting SO much glory and in the end I will be happy no matter what happens, I know He'll make sure of that. Isn't it great we have such a sovereign and loving God in our midst! He knows the depths of my heart and He loves me the same. I want I could praise Him with every breath of life He gives me. You are truly amazing God and I won't have to paste a smile on my face tomorrow when I walk in school. And when people ask me how I can do that I tell them about you! I truly and deeply adore you.

11/23/2008

The Love of God

There are so many things I could say. This weekend has been so difficult but so amazing, how passion can spark in your life so quick and all your focus is on God! for the first time in my life I feel so alive. I've been dead all these years and never noticed it. I can't live that way any longer, I'm ready to be who God made me to be. I'm amazed, in awe, in shock and if I could I would stand up and appauld during service and shout "amazing". I want to dedicate my life to a cause that is sufficient enough for Him.
An amazing thing, my grandma wrote me a letter telling me how proud she was of me for going to church without any other family and to be able to sing in front of everyone for God. I've never felt so great. And not because I was thinking "look at what I'VE aacomplished" more like "LOOK what is possible in Christ, when you obey Him there are no limits! when you pray to Him glory is clearly there!"
Today wasn't just another Sunday, This weekend wasn't just another weekend, This was a glorious change in my life! I'm ready to serve :]
I want what you want for me Lord, and if i ever want anything else, humble me and judge me.
I hope all you people on Facebook have the same belief. I hope you seek salvation! Because the time is so near! I pray you keep me accountable and you have faith in yourself.
Everything I do is not possible without HIM!

11/21/2008

When Life Gives you Lemons...

My word of advice is, don't live by feeling. I've found myself there before just like everyone else has, "well this will feel really awesome, even though it's not pleasing to God, I know it'll make me happy".
Feelings are a funny thing, a little rush of adrenaline and happiness sends us wanting more. Most times we're obeying God it's even by feeling. But it's our own flesh, and it's hard to escape. And that's why I'm writing this, because even though I may be going through tough times and everything feels terrible I know I don't have to make my decisions based on that. I'm gonna use my situation to do what's best for God, give Him the glory, and be patient enough to wait and see how His plan will unfold. Because I know every time I go through something hard I am changed by it, so instead of being completely depressed I'm almost excited. It's like watching a toy go down an assembly line. Every time it dissapears into a place where a part it added it comes out looking different. I'm waiting to see how I'll look and it makes me happy. Feelings aren't all bad, but I'll let God be the one that makes me happy.

11/11/2008

So I found out what I wanted to say..

Its this.
I'm sick of not fully living my life. I don't want to be "dead" in sin. I want to be alive in Christ. I feel this amazing passion inside lately to just get out and do something. ANYTHING. But problems keep popping in my head like: I can't drive, I don't have a way to get money, do I have the time..
What do I want to do exactly??
Well, glad you asked lol. I have a few things in mind. Even if it's just to keep busy. I just don't want to sit around in my house anymore, I wanna live!.
For instance.
-Play a sport at school. I feel left out and I'm afraid it's too late to start. But maybe it's not.
-Apply for more jobs. Money is always useful. Maybe it would help to get some!!
-Do more at church. Just being there makes me feel like I'm doing something specifically for God. And being around Christians makes me feel safe :]
-Gain more close friends and see those friends! I really feel like I'm not close to many people lately. I think that needs to change. Before it's too late you know.


I want to step out of my comfort zone. I want to experience life. Not just come home everyday with no intention of seeing anyone face to face and not wanting to. I'm hiding from the world. But I know that my heart is weak, and I can't do these things alone. I need help. I need prayer. I would appreciate the accountability :]

The Title

So I haven't written on here in forever. I'm pretty sure I gave the warning that that would happen. I tend to not want to write on blogs if I don't get a hundred comments on one post.. I get bored very easy.

Well.. I have a lot I want to talk about, but don't have the time or patience to type it out..